What a week it’s been. Life of a girl, balancing the motherhood with career, business and study. I always knew the juggling act was hard for working mothers, and I always gave a lot of credit to mothers I worked with in the office, who had a very successful career as well as maintained happy families. However, now that I’m actually a mum…. I realise the depth of those challenges and hoops those mothers jumped through to find balance.
In the past week I have been working my day job during the normal business hours and then during non-standard hours, I have been aggressively working towards my new business venture or spending my time studying. During this time, my mother-in-law has taken on my family day care children and started caring for my son Dom. This has given me more time to work and study.
I’m extremely grateful to have been able to find a solution for my son’s child care, but having him with someone who cares about his well-being just as much as I do has been an eye opener. My mother-in-law has been watching me tirelessly manage multiple things at once. And that’s when the ‘mother-in-law to daughter-in-law’ advice kicked in. Both my mother and mother-in-law (like most mothers) have a unique way of thinking and remembering what is important, as well as reminding everyone where their priorities should be.
‘Money wont make you happy. Don’t overwork yourself weekdays, nights and weekends. You’ll miss out on the important things like spending time with your family.’
Those might have not been her exact words. But that’s what she said in fewer words then used.
I believe this statement is true. I value and love my son / family more then anything in this world. But the misunderstanding in this statement is that I don’t work for money. I work for my own personal satisfaction. But regardless of my reason for working, I believe I would regret missing out on watching my son grow up.
I personally, really enjoy working. I don’t care how much I get paid as long as I am doing what I really enjoy. I don’t run a side business because I want to be rich or because I think it’s going to bring me riches. I run it simply because I enjoy managing and creating a business. I don’t study because I want career advancement, I study because I really enjoy learning new things. I’m one of those people that work well under pressure. I’m also a very curious person, so I love learning about things I don’t know about. But being a mum is not about just me, and I know that. Which is why I’m committing to at least 1 full day a week where I block out everything to focus on spending time with my family and son only. 1 day might not sound like a lot to some people but for me (someone who literally works until she sleeps, and works as soon as she wakes up) I feel like it’s a step in the right direction.
So key steps I’ll take to ensure I have a healthy relationship with my family and friends will include:
- Write notes in my diary on random calendar dates to remind me what’s important (a quote, or random happy memory)
- Dedicated a full day with no distractions. Remove access to my laptop and phone and anything else that is connected to work emails etc which will tempt me to break away from my family time to work.
- Remember, the work crisis will be there tomorrow for my to deal with
- Enjoy my family time and make the most out if it. Be engaged, not forced to take the time. Remember I want to be doing this, not ‘I have to be doing this’. Take a trip to the shops, park or visit family and friends.
- Most importantly… always find time to hug, kiss, laugh and play with my beautify baby boy.
I’ll have this work-life-balance juggling act perfected in no time! (hopefully, lol)